The Heart Behind the Pen: The Silence of a Blank Page

Sometimes overcoming blank page syndrome when starting a story you feel called to write can be overwhelming. As a Christian fiction author, it was that way with A Broken Embrace, which is the novel I plan to release for the 2026 year. The idea of the man from Bethesda found its way into my imagination shortly before I published The Hope of Inheritance, my award-winning novel from 2025.

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Silence Speaks when we Least Expect It

Writing about this man from Bethesda wasn’t planned. In fact, the story I am writing was never meant to be part of my biblical fiction series at all. Rahmiel, the main protagonist, didn’t exist in my mind at all. But, God has a funny way of guiding me to the stories he wants me to write. 

This one came one night as I was reading John chapter 5 to my youngest daughter, Hannah. I told her, “I wonder what his story actually was,” and then thought to myself; “I’ll bet you could think of one someday.” Nothing more came of the idea until a few months later when this writing contest kept showing up on one of my social media accounts. 

Again, I thought to myself, “I could enter that contest, but what story would I tell?” The story remained a blank page in my mind. While I did not know it at the time, it was a small nudge toward a much bigger story than I could have imagined. 

A few days later, I heard a sermon on a podcast about Bethesda. Later that night the ad for the contest showed up again. It was another nudge I completely ignored. But, the next day, the ad showed up again. 

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Listening to God's Voice isn’t always easy.

I knew something was going on, so I prayed about it asking God, ‘why is this contest so important for me to see? There is nothing brewing in my imagination that I could even enter in this contest.’ I waited and suddenly, that blank page in my mind showed the words…

“The cross was marked with the sweat of his brow, and the man who saved me from myself left the road behind him stained with blood.”

Those words sounded so familiar to me, but I could not place them. So I sat with them, hoping for the big reveal. As the day progressed, I was reminded of a song I wrote 13 years ago for my oldest daughter, Leyla. 

“The road was marked with suffering, his tears were stained with blood, the love of God sustaining through that open door.” 

I could not believe what I was seeing. 

God was showing me the story even 13 years ago, and I was in utter shock. Within 15 minutes, the first page of A Broken Embrace was written and after a few days of refining and editing, I submitted it as my entry into the contest on a whim of obedience.

In the end, A Broken Embrace didn’t win, but it was on the short list of top tier entries for the contest. The feedback I received from the judges only echoed what I already knew. There was something to this story and it was only when I left it at the feet of God in prayerful worship that I found the words to fill my first blank page.

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How Brother Lawrence Influenced my Writing as Worship

It did not come because I was trying to write the best story ever as an offering to him. It came because I waited on God to show me the way forward. My faith-based writing process shifted when I realized I was writing with God, not just for Him.

That is something reading Brother Lawrence's reflection, Practicing the Presence of God, has reminded me of every time I’ve read it. 

Through his short book on Practicing the Presence of God, I’ve come to see my writing ministry not just as a task, but as a direct act of worship.  As we go through a few of my favorite quotes in upcoming publications, that is something worth paying attention to.

See you in the pages,

MJE